Printable leadership tool

Difficult Conversation Planner

Use this before a conversation about a missed expectation, repeated behaviour, performance concern or working relationship. Write facts, not a closing argument.

All Resources

1. What happened?

Write the behaviour, date, output or agreement another person could also observe. Avoid labels such as careless, difficult or unmotivated.

2. What was expected?

What specific result, behaviour, quality, deadline or communication did you expect? Where was it agreed?

3. Why does the gap matter?

Describe the effect on clients, colleagues, time, trust, risk or results without exaggeration.

4. What do you need to understand?

Choose two curious questions. Example: “What was happening from your perspective?” or “What made the expectation unclear?”

5. What needs to happen next?

State the new agreement, who owns it, the date and how you will know it happened.

A clear opening sentence

“I want to talk about [specific situation], understand what happened from your perspective and agree what needs to be different next time.”

Knowing the words is one thing. Saying them is another.

If the same conversation keeps being postponed, we can prepare it together.

Discuss Your Situation